How much more can you pack into a weekend?

What a fabulous weekend. T and I took Friday off to give ourselves a long weekend. We relaxed, we watched TV, he played his video game,I knit myself a purse and matching shawl, we ordered in BBQ ribs and ate chocolate malt cake. I took a couple days off the Metformin and I drank vodka martinis, Miller Lite (I let out my first real belch in 3 months!) and Bicardi Silver. YUM! I watched my cooking shows taped on the DVR, I watched Adoption Stories and cried as usual. We went to the gym, we had breakfast with my uncle on Sunday, we played pool and we talked...a lot.

-We are now officially a team and will go to all doctor appointments together starting Thursday at my GYN.

-We agreed insurance or not we are going to see the Fertility God and will ask for a referral on Thursday from my GYN. If she doesn't give us one we will go anyway.

-We will go together to his urologist appointment the first week of May.

-I found out the reason he hasn't wanted me to see a male GYN/RE is because he is afraid I will be molested and he doesn't believe that I would stop it right away, I'm too trusting. (I have always thought his reservations were about another man seeing my private parts, this new revelation really shocked me.) He wants to be in the room so if he sees any sign of distress from me he can kick the doctor's ass. I told him I doubt this will be necessary but he would feel better if he went and I would prefer for him to go just so we both know what the doctor says, so he's going with me. He believes that I would not stop a doctor from touching me inappropriately because I could not give him the reason that women get a rectal exam as part of the annual exam at the GYN. He simply could not believe I let the Dr. stick her finger up my ass every year and I've never asked what she's looking for. Now how do I hold my husband back while in the stirrups? Anyone?

-T questions his second SA results. He wants to know how he could lose 30 million sperm in a month. 30-Million! If it were 30 million dollars people would stand up and take notice, but since they are just sperm we get a referral to the urologist and a shrug of the shoulders. He thinks the lab made a mistake. We figure between the urologist and the Fertility God we will repeat the test at least two more times so we'll be able to have some definitive answers.

-We decided the white trash that live across the street is close enough to a trailer park so we will sneak over and make use of their bushes some dark night. This will allow me to postpone my career change to crack whore for at least a little while.

In other news:

-We got a long rambling message on our answering machine from T's mother saying something about the Terry Schiavo case and she is going to call her lawyer and would T be willing to sign off on something saying they could pull the plug on her, etc. T said she better be careful, he'll pull the plug now. (You must understand that no one in his family recognized his birthday until after the fact when they called to tell him all the stupid reasons they didn't send a card or call on his actual birthday. He was quite hurt that the only cards he received were from my aunt and my grandparents. What can I say, it is better to be an Elephant than a Trunk.)

Saving the best for last:

-I ovulated this weekend...on my own...no Clomid...Oh My God!!!! I feel like I won the lotto! I've had sore nipples for days, three bars and an egg on the monitor Saturday and Sunday and my temp went up this morning. Holy Shit my body actually worked! Shh, don't tell anyone, maybe if we don't mention it, it might happen again!