I am a horrible date. It is a good thing that T and I got together when we were 13 or I never would have found a husband.
What is a typical date? Let’s review. Most “normal” people would say dinner, movie/theater/sporting event or some other fun activity together, followed by the goodnight kiss or sex. Right? Is that how it is supposed to go?
See, we keep getting this wrong. We do all the right things, but in the wrong order.
Last week we has sex for two hours which made us late for the hockey game we went to see and then ate dinner when we got home. See, all out of order.
We had tickets to see our local arena football team play on Saturday night. The game started at 7:30pm so we figured we would eat dinner at home first and then head downtown.
Around 5pm or so I saw T lying on the couch. I asked if he was going to take a nap before dinner. He said no. I rubbed his back a bit and then he flipped over and grabbed me in a big bear hug. “I owe you some sperm!” he said. Well, you don’t have to twist my arm on that one. I had three bars and an egg on the monitor that morning and hope is running high this cycle since it is my last chance to continue the baby-at-30 line established by my grandmother and mother. SO, we ended up in the guestroom (I’ll have to remember to change those sheets) and proceeded to get down to business. :0)
Afterwards T was quite intrigued by the Instead Cup as I explained what it was, the intended purpose, why I was using it then and he watched me insert it. Fascinating stuff! He said “I hope you’re all knocked up this time.” We chuckled at the crudity but we both hope it is true.
We then grilled T’s burgers and my salmon with diced pineapple and mango (YUM!) and sat down to eat about 7:50pm.
Did you catch that? Right, the game started at 7:30, we were at home starting dinner at 7:50. OK, just so we understand each other.
We arrived at the game in the second quarter, realized we weren't losing too badly and hope kicked in again. (Funny thing hope, pretty flexible.) There were touchdowns and interceptions and flags on many plays. It was a fun game…but we lost…we always lose. Anyway…
Sitting in the row behind us was the Uber Family. They have season tickets so we have gotten to "enjoy" them on more than one occasion. Mom, Dad, three girls and a boy. They (the kids) were all dressed in their team fan gear complete with pom poms in hopes of making it onto the jumbo-tron screen...it worked. They yelled and cheered and screamed at the top of their shrill little voices. At one point, my eardrums exploded into a zillion tiny little pieces. I just wanted to take one of those pom poms and jam it down their throats.
I nudged T and said “Just think, one day we will have one of those.” He said, “No, I think we’ll have one of those.” And he pointed to the little girl sitting in front of me. She was tall and thin and had her blonde hair up in a clip the same way I wear mine on occasion. She was maybe 7 years old. She was wearing jeans and a hooded sweatshirt, much like my own. She was quiet and polite and drank her soda and ate her Peanut M&Ms and watched the players on the field. My heart just melted.
I keep hearing Monica on Friends hugging little Emma and saying to Chandler “I want one” and he responds back “Me too”.
This coming Saturday we will be here to see this band. We damned well better not be late!